There was an old Mexican taking his new bride home on his burro.
the burro stumbled and the 'bride' cursed the burro.
The old Mexican said Thats One
After a while the burro stopped and wouldn't move, the old Mexican hit it in the butt with a cactus
The old Mexican said Thats Two
A little further on the trail home the burro turned and tried to bite the new bride riding on his back
The old Mexican said Thats Three, and shot the burro in the head
The new bride was not happy at all because she knew she would now have to walk... She started yelling at the old Mexican.
He looked right at her and said Thats One.....
You need to tell your wife that story, and then bring in the spider!!!!!!!