Joke time....

Floorist

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Colonoscopies are no joke, but these comments during the exam were quite humorous..... A physician claimed that the following are actual comments made by his patients (predominately male) while he was performing their colonoscopies:
1. 'Take it easy, Doc. You're boldly going where no man has gone before!'
2. 'Find Amelia Earhart yet?'
3. 'Can you hear me NOW?'
4. 'Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?'
5. 'You know, in Arkansas , we're now legally married.'
6. 'Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?'
7. 'You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out...'
8. 'Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!'
9. 'If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit!'
10. 'Hey Doc, let me know if you find my dignity.'
11. 'You used to be an executive at Enron, didn't you?'
12. 'God, now I know why I am not gay..'
And the best one of all:
13. 'Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up there?'
 

oldognewtrick

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On this day, 51 years ago, America put three men inside the tip of a rocket and shot them all the way to the moon.

Now, we're all wearing underwear on our faces and can't figure out how to get kids into a classroom.

Devolution sucks. :-/
 

Floorist

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Q: What will Joe Biden's first words be when he enters the White House after the 2021 inauguration?

A: "Thank you, President Trump, for inviting me here...."
 
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