Joke time....

Havasu

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Floorist

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She gets into the cab, and notices that the VERY handsome cab driver won't stop staring at her. She asks him why he is staring.
He replies: "I have a question to ask you but I don't want to offend you."
She answers, "My son, you cannot offend me. When you're as old as I am And have been a nun as long as I have, you get a chance to see and hear just about everything. I'm sure that there's nothing you could say or ask that I would find offensive."
"Well, I've always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss me."
She responds, "Well, let's see what we can do about that: #1, you have to be single and #2, you must be Catholic."
The cab driver is very excited and says, "Yes, I'm single and Catholic!"
"OK" the nun says. "Pull into the next alley."
The nun fulfills his fantasy, with a kiss that would Make a hooker blush.
When they get back on the road, the cab driver starts crying.
"My dear child," says the nun, "why are you crying?"
"Forgive me but I've sinned. I lied and I must confess,
"I'm married and I'm Jewish."
The nun says, "That's OK.
My name is Kevin and I'm going to a Halloween party.
 

Floorist

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I stopped by my local Dodge Dealership this morning to look for a new truck. I saw a nice 2500 Diesel crew cab loaded with all the options that I liked and asked to take it for a test drive.
The salesperson (a lady wearing a Biden for President lapel pin) sat in the passenger seat next to me, describing the truck and all its options. She explained that the Electric Seats were connected to the ventilation system and could be set to direct cool air to your butt in the summer & warm air to your butt in the winter.
So I mentioned that this must be a "Trump truck". She looked at me a bit angry, and asked why I thought it was a Trump truck. I told her that if it were a Biden truck, the seats would just blow smoke up my ass year round.
The two mile walk back to the dealership to pick up my car was worth it.
 

Barrie

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I stopped by my local Dodge Dealership this morning to look for a new truck. I saw a nice 2500 Diesel crew cab loaded with all the options that I liked and asked to take it for a test drive.
The salesperson (a lady wearing a Biden for President lapel pin) sat in the passenger seat next to me, describing the truck and all its options. She explained that the Electric Seats were connected to the ventilation system and could be set to direct cool air to your butt in the summer & warm air to your butt in the winter.
So I mentioned that this must be a "Trump truck". She looked at me a bit angry, and asked why I thought it was a Trump truck. I told her that if it were a Biden truck, the seats would just blow smoke up my ass year round.
The two mile walk back to the dealership to pick up my car was worth it.


LOL!!!!
 
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