Joke time....

Floorist

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fork control.jpg
 

Floorist

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Harrison Bergeron (where we are headed?)
In the year 2081, the 211th, 212th, and 213th amendments to the Constitution dictate that all Americans are fully equal and not allowed to be smarter, better-looking, or more physically able than anyone else. The Handicapper General's agents enforce the equality laws, forcing citizens to wear "handicaps": masks for those who are too beautiful, loud radios that disrupt thoughts inside the ears of intelligent people, and heavy weights for the strong or athletic
 

Floorist

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A big game hunter went on a safari with his wife and mother-in-law.
One morning, while still deep in the jungle, the hunter's wife awakened to find her mother gone.
She woke her husband, and they both set off in search of the old woman.
In a clearing not far from the camp, they came upon a chilling sight. The mother-in-law was standing face-to-face with a lion
"What are we going to do?" his horrified wife asked.
"Nothing," her husband replied, "The lion got himself into this mess, let him get himself out of it."
 

Floorist

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Ever notice when you look in the obituaries that everyone dies in alphabetical order? If I had to do this over again I would change my name to one that starts with a Z
 

Floorist

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Did you know that talking to yourself actually makes you more intelligent? I don't know if it's true or not, but that's what I just told me
 
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